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Friday, 26 January 2007

Stampede at the 'NOT' OK corral !

It seems that the urgency to migrate the last 10% of blogs, turned into a stampede.

By definition, a stampede is a chaotic mess of some group of individuals, whether it be people, or cattle, (as I depicted in earlier episodes), or, in this case, bloggers, not knowing where they're going, when they're supposed to get there, and what to expect when they get 'there'. Of course, no communication was given other than - here is your invitation - go!

If you didn't accept the invitation immediately, you were sidelined for later retrieval, or salvage, when, and if, they - (Blogger (Cowboys), from Mr. B. Logger's ranch) decide to send out some herders to do a partial round-up of stragglers. The cowboys aren't too worried, as things aren't too good at the 'NOT OK' corral and they have plenty of work to do.

The push came. I had hoped it wouldn't, because the corrals were not ready - especially at Christmas-time. The infra-structure of the Ranch was not in place, and many pens still had no gates, or no rails, and the feed lots weren't there. Some of the staff-members, who were relied on, went on holidays. One to distant, sunny shores, to get away from the pressures of the snow-belt, and really let the team down. Replacement staff were brought in, but weren't up to snuff, and were conspicuous by their absences.

Oh, yeah, sure, some of the cattle which had been moved during the initial, trial round-up, were there, but they were happy, contented cows, out in the pasture and were experiencing life as it should be. Only a few of them were prepared to call in to the chuck-wagon to assist the cowboys with the bulk of the scared and frightened cattle, which had just been driven from the hills, in a rushed, and disorderly, fashion. They were even given special names as a sign of gratitude, and recognition, from Mr. B. Logger.

There were a few stray dog-bitches, as well, always snapping at each other, and a few wise-arsed, know-it-all mongrels, generally, making things worse. You'd think they had been through it all before.

They were concerned about so many things, but, mainly, that the cowboys couldn't cope by themselves. It seemed that every time the Cowboys fixed a fence, a gate would fall over. Then they'd fix the gate and a railing would collapse. They'd never tell the cattle which pens were good ones, and which weren't, either. Some cattle were spooked and jumped the fences, wanting to take-off for the hills - again.

Of course, many cattle weren't happy with the new corrals, as they were, and immediately went on a 'change the corral' spree. They wanted fancy steel railings instead of timber, sliding gates instead of post and rail swingers. Nothing will ever make those cattle happy.

Overall, it looks like the final rush to get all the cattle in, before Christmas, was a pie-in-the-sky dream for the Cowboys, and they nearly, actually, did it. The trouble is, that there are still so many strays to pick up and bring in. So many scared and aimless cattle just waiting for guidance, and assurances, that they'll be very busy for quite some time, yet. So many problems for the management of the ranch.

The main water troughs, (and there are thousands of them), which are relied on so heavily, are inadequate. At last count, there were 502 wouldn't work - some for 3 hours! Other times, there were 404. Then, to sectionalise them, Mr. B. Logger decided to give them all special names (he's good at doing that). Names like 'bX-numbers'. Really confusing for the cattle, too. But, of course, they will never find out what the numbers mean, so it's not a concern of the Cowboys.

Then, in an effort to pacify some of the cattle, Mr. B. Logger's partners, Giggle Cattle Corporation, chipped in with some new paint-work for an already rotten chuck-wagon, nick-named the Groups. This is where most of the cattle vent their spleens and, also, ask for advice. This is also where the experienced cattle come for a quiet cuppa and some good cud-chewing.

Today might well be Australia Day, in OZ, but it sure ain't Blogger Day anywhere else.

I'll keep an eye on the proceedings from here on, because it's too funny to dismiss as a joke - completely!


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